Unless you have also had illness abruptly take away your career, your mobility, your social contact and your voice, you may not understand how important it is to feel like you make a difference in the world. Your scope narrows. I don’t set my sights on trying to be everything to everyone anymore, trying to multitask every moment of the day and accomplish everything perfectly, never letting one of those spinning plates drop… Now, I hope I can make someone laugh or manage to clean a toilet every once in a while. Making a ripple in the universe, no matter how small, fills me with immeasurable joy. Thank you, M., for the note and the book. ❤
Rag and Bone Shop of the Heart 
What a wonderful treat and a wonderful book. The universe gifts us when we least expect!!! xxx
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It’s true- this gift was totally unexpected, which makes it all the more sweet. X
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That is so wonderful that they took the time out to thank you. I love it 🙂
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I collect cards on my mantle piece, they remind me that I’m remembered. 🙂
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It is so wonderful when you are told that you are making a difference in someone’s life. And when you are ill and feel you are not contributing to anything, it is even more special. How lovely!
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Isn’t it? 🙂 That is my goal each day: make a difference. Even if it’s just petting my dogs!
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It’s great to touch base with a fellow CFSer. It’s been eleven years for me. How long for you? I read a bit of your article about your CFS. I have been through the many methods of improving symptoms and am currently on anti depressants and many other meds for other issues. I am 61 years of age. Your first few paragraphs that I just read sounded like I would have written it. lol No good doc for me right now . Too many years of BS to mess with them. Still working on getting ssdi after all these years. I know what you mean when you say getting the toilet cleaned in a days time is success. Sending gentle hugs! Brenda
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I got sick 2 years 5 months and 6 days ago, but who’s counting? Thanks so much for the comment. I hope the meds are helping. So far, everything I’ve tried has made me feel worse, so I soldier on. I’m finally thinking about disability, I’ve been in total denial thus far… it sounds like such a hard slog. Hugs back to you. 🙂
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Oh my dear. The best thing you can do for yourself is to forget just exactly how long it has been to the day cuz it tears us up. A helpful hint…see a good psychiatric nurse practitioner or good psychologist. That is wear I finally got some relief. I ended up on Abilify to boost the effects of the anti-depressants. Also, I found a great internist who worked with me regarding every symptom, listened to my every word, etc. He, too, felt helpless in light of the numerous lab records that went awry throughout about eight years with him. I married and moved away so no longer have him. My primary now, as I think I had mentioned, is a younger woman who treats me like a dumdum. I haven’t seen her, only the NP who left my facility now too, having moved away. We CFSers must rally together but I will admit I have bitten the bullet when it comes to fighting for answers because it all goes round and round in circles never going anywhere. FDA promises things, NIH, DHHS, CDC, they all make promises then break them. I advocated for years writing to my politicians, et. to no avail. So, now that I’ve written a book you can lie down again. lol Gentle hugs, Brenda
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Brenda, what is your book? I would love to read it.
I definitely don’t feel the need to be on antidepressants – my pain has gotten better and I don’t feel depressed – but I sure would like to find a sleep drug I can tolerate!
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My book is “Courage Times Three. A Novel”. You can buy it at:
It’s a Christian fiction historical family saga spread out from Europe to America over a century’s time. It’s a real interesting fiction with true to life factual events in it. I do think you would find it interesting.
I did Ambien, then Trazadone until I cried out for Jesus to give me sleep one day and He did. That was several years ago. God is awesome and gave me a true to life miracle. My husband died in an auto accident in our mid twenties and between that and the illness now I’d experienced enough in life to write wholly from my heart. I have never had to take a sleeping pill since my miracle and my health is much improved because of it. Just click on the URL and it will bring you to Amazon with more info on it and to purchase if you want one. It’s so nice having you to chat with and I would love for you to read the book.
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So sorry about the tragedy of your husband’s death. Good for you for being able to channel your experiences into a novel!
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ps keep every record of every visit available for SS as they want everything and I have been denied seven times within two separate claims over eight years.
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That is horrific. I finally called a lawyer because I haven’t been able to manage the application alone. I have to gather all my doctors’names in the next ten days and it is a daunting task. I have seen SO many. Thank you for the tip, I wish I had been keeping track the last two and a half years!
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Elisabeth, I know exactly how you feel! It’s always with a guilty joy that I find out that a friend is having relationship troubles, or is upset by something. I can’t do anything much except listen, but I’m great at that. I love being useful in this small way – just being there to support them, even when no advice can be given, I’ll just be there.
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I think it’s more important for us than them! I’m so happy when I can give anything to a relationship now that I can’t physically be there. 🙂
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