Ugh. I am so tired. I had another terrible night. I took the LDN and was in bed at 10pm and didn’t get up until 9am. In 11 hours, I managed to get 6.5 hours sleep. I woke up constantly again. (Check out the Zeo graph. “W” at the top = “wake”) I had to go to the bathroom constantly. I was uncomfortable and in pain. I had crazy dreams. I was sweaty, but cold. Extreme hunger finally forced me out of bed. Ugh.

There’s this thing I do in my sleep that always wakes me up. I wake up with all of my muscles tensed from head to toe, my back in an arch, my hands in fists, my arms and legs rigid, my jaw clamped down so hard it feels like my teeth might break (and they have). I have no idea why it happens or how to stop it, but I am always afraid that I am going to throw my neck out while doing it. I have degenerative disc disease issues in my neck (cervical spine). When my neck goes out, it is the most acute pain I have ever experienced in my life. I am paralysed when this happens. I have been seeing a physical therapist for years with minimal progress. She said I had the worst case of hypermobility she had ever treated. I have an at-home TENS unit (transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation) which I use every day. It helps me not have to use pain killers and I basically stopped going to the PT, because now I have the equipment they use at home. Today, as I type this, I have it zapping my back and neck ~ I tweaked something in the night with all the tensing and thrashing about.

I haven’t had a “good” day since the day I started LDN. I have felt fluish and chilled every day this week. The pain in my back, shoulders and neck makes it difficult to do much ~ even walking up and down the stairs. My chest is tight the past 5 days and my nose is either running or stuffed up. My hands ache. My left thumb has been virtually useless for days because there is a painful electric jolt that runs down it every time I press it into a certain position. After lunch yesterday with my friend, I had planned on going shopping for groceries and supplements for the new regimen, but, after two hours of visiting, I was weak, felt faint, my muscles were buzzing, my concentration was totally shot. I was having such a hard time focusing on our conversation and the responses I should give… That doesn’t happen a lot to me. I have had some cognitive disturbances with memory, but having to put so much effort into focusing on what you are hearing and what you should say… that’s a new one.

I would love to tell you about the stool sample kit that I have to do, but I won’t. It might be the most disgusting thing I’ve ever dealt with. Well, that’s not true. I’ve dealt with more disgusting things (work in an elderly care facility and restaurants long enough and you see things you don’t want to). In fact, I’ve experienced more disgusting things just surfing the internet.

Today, I am determined to go to the dog park, the pharmacy and the grocery store. I’m determined to finish the laundry and laugh and PLEASE GOD get a better night’s sleep. Maybe I should take a melatonin…. but I hate mixing drugs. Stay tuned.